Flash Fiction
Brief Encounter
2021 Winner of the Mslexia Max Flash Challenge Issue 89
Helena buckled her green leather boots, picked up her bag, and headed out into the cold. She had fifteen minutes. Enough time to buy a coffee and walk around the park.
In the queue next to her was a tall woman with orange Doc Martens shoes. Tall, with big hands and small breasts. Helena imagined touching the shoes, pushing them onto her feet, pulling the laces tight. She smiled briefly at the woman, and the woman started to talk:
“Here for coffee?”
Helena nodded. “Nice shoes” she said.
“Oh yes. Thank you – you too…”
Helena blushed.
The coffee arrived. Helena didn’t want to leave. She wanted to stay close to this woman.
Helena pretended to look at something on her phone. She found herself walking behind the woman, towards the high street.
The woman entered a Buddhist Centre. Helena paused outside. What was she doing here? She was going to be late. She started to push the door.
“If you could just put your shoes on the shelf before you go in” said the woman behind the counter.
“Oh actually, I’m sorry I don’t have time today – do you have any leaflets?”
“Of course.” The woman went into the back.
Helena took the leaflet and started to walk home, taking slow sips of coffee, her bag bumping uncomfortably against her leg. She was going to be just in time for the 11am Zoom meeting.
She shut the door behind her, adding the orange shoes to her growing collection.
Judges’ Comments: Meg Pokrass on the ‘Temptation’ Flash Challenge
"Temptation" offered a rich creative starter because it involves a divided state-of-mind. The temptation to do something implies that there is choice in the matter and brings into consideration an individual’s strength of character. I’m happy to say that the theme fulfilled its promise in drawing out many rich, dramatic stories!
As always, writers approached this theme from different angles. The strongest submissions offered scenes of dramatic urgency. Many of the storylines involved theft, infidelity, escape fantasies, and bad impulses run amok. There were many strong entries, making it incredibly hard to choose just three. Ultimately, these winning three stories created a flash of awakening—an epiphanic moment that illuminated for the reader a deeper and more troubling narrative condition.
Brief Encounter involves a scene in which a character covets an article of clothing a stranger is wearing and cannot resist the temptation to follow them. It is hard to create such an edge-of-the seat experience in so few words. The story tackles the subject of theft and obsessive behavior with an excellent sense of timing and pacing, creating a feeling of suspense.